Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Traditional: Aluminum / Modern: Diamond Jewelry / Me: Bacon

May 2001

I was at my old job on hold with Verizon. That's what one does as office manager. Get problems solved. Listening to some screechy muzak. Decided I'll go on to Planetout.com and peruse the new ads. I come across this photo (image to the left is not the actual picture but damn near close) of the CUTEST – hell, maybe even the HANDSOMEST – guy I've seen in a long time. That smile I'd kill for. Those beautiful big brown eyes. He's moving here (to DC) straight outta college. Crap, that means he's young. Like, really young. Oh well, I'll still be nice and write him to say hello. I'm good like that.

I tell him first and foremost I am in NO WAY hitting on him... way too old. But if he needs any help getting acclimated to DC I've lived here a while so could show him around. Not sure if he knows anyone here but just putting it out there. Again, I'm NOT hitting on him. But yeah, you are a really, really good looking guy. Send. Good lord I'm a freak.

I get a response. I don't remember it exactly BUT it was positive for we spoke on the phone for a couple of weeks. Loved talking to him but that could have just been the getting-to know-you-getting-to know-all-about-you newness. Nope, I really liked talking to him. Simmer down, Jeff. Made plans to meet soon when he'd come down from New Jersey to go apartment hunting. Cool. I'll be here. “Indifference”

The day came to meet and I was a mess. Why? We were just meeting to say hello. No more, no less. Set up a time to meet. Okay, I'll there. Oops, I wasn't there. I'm coming, I'm coming. Oh wait, I haven't even left the house yet. Nerves were getting the best of me. I'm looking at the clock on my wall. I should have been in Dupont 5 minutes yet here I am still at home, in Capitol Hill. Get yourself together, Jeff.. he's just a guy. I leave.

Walk down the street towards the coffee internet place and there he is. My god.. he's really attractive. Apologize profusely. Internally thinking, dude, you should have just left. I'm a freak. Not wrapped too tight. Instead he just smiles (THAT SMILE!!!!) and says all is forgiven. Maybe he sees the fear and trepidation radiating off of me. Oh well. Since this isn't a date we head into JRs to hang and drink and talk. I thought I was gonna talk. What is it about this guy that's making me all discombobulated. Very rarely have a hard time talking to guys. I'm sucking at the small talk but dammit I will not bring up the weather. Whew.. Faygele Feud's going on which means more viewing, less chit-chat. Again, whew! I am enjoying myself though.

So, it's time to head home. Work in the morning. Umm.. not sure what you're plans are but you could stay at my place. I'm pretty sure he immediately says yes. Free lodging for the night, of course he does. Next challenge: he drives so I have to get him from JRs to Capitol Hill with my extensive knowledge of directions. I'm being facetious. I get lost coming in and out of buildings. I could go into a building for a second, come out and forget which way from whence I came. Dork. Oh well, we'll be jolly good friends. Not like this was a date anyway. Just some older guy helping out when he can. I'm certain this will be the last I see of him anyway. Not really coming across as well-adjusted. Referring to me of course. I mean I think I'm cute and all but hell, I sometimes get tired of hanging around my dimwitted self. Well, someone was looking out for me because we managed to get to my place in a relatively short time. And I haven't been thrown out of the car.

For not hardly talking earlier in the evening I'm making up for lost time between getting out of the car and getting to the door. I'm pretty sure I manage to reveal absolutely little thing wrong with the apartment. Seriously, Jeff, shut the hell up. The apartment was clean and it really wasn't in bad shape. In my head I think I lived in Jed Clampett's old place.

Well, we hang out.. watch some TV. Yeah, the madness of TV watching started early. I'm comfortable and all I know is I want to kiss this guy. So I do it. It's reciprocated. Veddy nice. Veddy nice. Making out goes on for some time. Now it's late and I really do have to get to bed. Work comes early. So we go to bed. To sleep. Well, some more kissing first. Zzzzzzz. Snore.

I wake up and decide to run down 2-3 blocks away and get some doughnuts at the 7-11 for this guy I just met. Again, I'm good like that. Leave them on the nightstand and leave a note telling him he can stay there today as long as he needs to. I almost write thanking him for not killing me. But I wise up. I almost write thanking him for not robbing me while I'm at work. But I wise up. Don't want to put any ideas in his head. Plus, I look around – what in the hell is there to steal? My 1,700 music cassettes? I'm off to work.

I'm guessing that was a date after all. Our third date? Home Depot. I need some stuff to take care of the kitchen. I don't drive. He did. Would he be so kind? I'm sure I didn't say it like that but damn near close.

He's done his apartment-hunting and heads back to New Jersey. I'm thinking, I really really really like this guy. And I really want to get to know everything about him. And I want to start sharing experiences with him. Soooooo... I break it off with the other 2 guys I was seeing at the time. They weren't serious bf material – both less than a month. I knew this once I met Dan. Not saying Dan was “the one” (yet) but I knew they weren't.

A week or so later I broke it to him. I let him know I was very much into him and had no desire to see anyone else. Wouldn't ask that of him but just putting it out there that that's where I stood. He felt the same. Woo hoo!!!

And THAT was 10 years ago today. Wow. I won't deny we've had our ups and downs – maybe even broke up 2-3 times at the beginning. He had his issues, of course, but I'm a true nutcase. He also loves to make me aware, from time to time, that he “gave me his 20's.” Of which I'll forever be grateful. But unlike anyone I've ever known I love this guy so much. Truly my best friend. I'm enjoying growing old(er) with him. I could go on and on but don't wanna get too sappy. We hate sappy. Just keep in mind that the day NY gays are allowed to get married I want to go there with you, Dan. You know our wedding would kick non-conventional ass. :)

Happy 10th Mister Calamari!!! xoxoxo